Title: Control
Fandom: Hawaii five-0/Sentinel
Rating: PG-13
Length: 769
Content notes: A little prequel to a story I'm working on. Danny angst. Danny is sixteen.
Author notes: A huge THANKS goes to brumeier, for being a horrible enabler, amazing beta reader and overall wonderful friend. This is dedicated to her, because without her, it wouldn't exist.
Summary: Danny's life takes a change in direction when at age sixteen he is deemed lacking as a Guide.



Danny’s hand shook as he unfolded the official letter the Center had sent. A lump formed in his throat when he saw the word ‘DENIED’ stamped in bright red ink across the bottom half of the sheet. Danny blinked back tears. He wouldn’t cry. He was sixteen years old and a proper Guide. He had control over his feelings, no matter what the stupid old frump who had ‘evaluated’ him said.

So what if his petition for re-evaluation by another Instructor had been denied? He’d learn to deal with it, and appeal at the first possible moment. He’d make a fine Guide for a Sentinel one day, Danny just knew it. He wouldn’t let someone who didn’t even know him tell him otherwise.

‘Improper’ she had called him. ‘Impulsive’, ‘volatile’ and ‘out of control’, she’d said. ‘Completely unsuited to be Guiding anyone’ – which was the death sentence for his dream of being part of a Sentinel/Guide team. He wouldn’t even be able to come near a Sentinel, let alone be tested for compatibility.

Danny crumpled up the paper and tossed it in the trash. He was fine. It was just a slight setback. Nothing to worry about, really. He walked over to his bed and flopped down on it, curling up on his side. He’d just have to wait a little longer to be able to meet the Sentinel he was meant for, that was all. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad. He’d appeal in four years – which was the earliest possible time – and the next Instructor would surely approve of him.

Maya appeared in a flash of psionic energy, her eyes kind and way more understanding than Danny really liked. She made a small sound and a gesture that Danny suspected was something like a question if he was all right. They were developing their own little collection of signs – almost like a proper language. Danny had read that somewhere someone was teaching a real Gorilla ASL. Maybe one day Maya and he would be able to have a real ‘conversation’, too.

Maya climbed onto the bed and settled next to him in an attempt to comfort him. It was nice, but it also made Danny angry. Why the hell couldn’t he be like all the other new Guides? Why had they taken exception with his attitude and not with others who were just about as impatient as he was, and who hadn’t even met their spirit animal yet? Why was he found to be faulty when all he wanted was to find a Sentinel to help? To belong with?

“Go away”, Danny said. He couldn’t bear the thought of his spirit animal comforting him. He didn’t want her comfort, didn’t need anyone or anything. He’d work hard, be patient, and become the poster boy Guide the Instructor seemed to want. He could do it.

Danny closed his eyes and took a deep, measured breath. Then he started to build the most solid, durable shields he could manage. Slowly, from the inside out, he hid his core away. Shield after shield, wall after wall, he built, and with every layer he added the impressions of the outside world dimmed and started to fade away.

He lost Maya first, her psionic presence fading out before disappearing completely. His empathy, the ability to touch another through his gifts, went next. It was like closing a window to a noisy street, until no sound remained.

When he was done, nothing and no-one would be able to reach his core, not without a lot of brute force, which would damage him in the process. He’d walled himself in, closed himself off, and to anyone short of a very talented Sentinel or Guide he would almost feel like he wasn’t gifted at all. If they couldn’t reach him, they couldn’t hurt him. If they couldn’t hurt him, unsettle him, make him feel the things only a Guide could feel, then he would be able to stay in control.

Calm.

Centered.

In control.

The stable Guide they said he’d never be able to be.

He’d show them how wrong they were. He’d surprise them with how perfect he would be. He’d be worthy. Worthy of even the most cherished, precious Sentinels the Center found. He just had to keep up his shields and be patient.

Danny could do patient. He really could. He could do anything if it meant being taken off the blacklist and getting a chance at being a real Guide. A Guide a Sentinel would be proud calling his mate.

He’d prove them wrong.

It was the only chance he had.